webkinzie

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About webkinzie

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So far webkinzie has created 9 blog entries.

The First Time I Ever Wanted to Kill Myself

It’s a warm day in April 2017. My day started as they usually do…wake up, shower, eat, pill. That evening was Easter supper at my aunts (a welcome break from being alone in the suburbs). My car was out of commission, so I rode my bike from my house to [...]

The First Time I Ever Wanted to Kill Myself2018-12-08T23:16:43+00:00

Being the Skeleton in My Closet

I was always a good kid, I almost always listened to my mother and I always listened to my mother when it was about something important. Except once. The truth is, you probably know someone who is going through this, or has in the past. This is not just my [...]

Being the Skeleton in My Closet2018-12-08T23:13:34+00:00

Mad Mommy

Sometimes I struggle to get out of bed in the morning. Not because I didn’t get enough sleep, but because I can’t bear to think about what the day might bring. Sometimes I struggle with getting dressed. Not because I am in pain, but because I can’t be bothered to [...]

Mad Mommy2018-12-08T23:11:23+00:00

I’m Okay

I used to be so thankful that I’m a strong person. I take comfort in knowing I’m dependable, and it brings me overwhelming joy to be the person my loved ones come to in times of distress. I find peace in bringing sorrow to an end. Just knowing I’m the [...]

I’m Okay2018-12-08T23:09:06+00:00

I Am Struggling

I am struggling. Yes, I said it. It feels good to say it out loud, actually. As an admitted type A personality. parenthood has brought me down to earth in a major way, especially having two babies under two. I am the kind of person who likes structure, organization, and [...]

I Am Struggling2018-12-08T23:06:55+00:00

Who is Kinijalele?

Who is Kinijalele? Who is Savanna? My brand is recovery, maybe not online, but certainly in my understanding of myself. If I asked myself? I am Savanna, I am a fighter, a survivor of trauma, anorexia, borderline personality disorder and a person living in recovery from addiction. That’s who I [...]

Who is Kinijalele?2018-12-08T23:03:01+00:00

The Trouble with Outside

An insatiable need to live runs deep Though these walls confine me Anxious, depressed, thought weak These terms do not define me The door opens, outside awaits First few steps have my legs wobbling Sweat glands on overdrive, my face hot Tight chest, my heart, it's throbbing My sweat has [...]

The Trouble with Outside2018-12-08T22:59:40+00:00

I Try to Keep on Going

Just think it away, take some deep breaths That's what they've tried to tell me Here, just take these pills, use this oil These things, they've tried to sell me Feel like I could sleep all day I don't remember to drink or eat It's easier to give in than [...]

I Try to Keep on Going2018-12-08T22:57:29+00:00

Just Because I Smile

Life can be overwhelming Sometimes, I still feel I can't breathe But it's gone from hospital trips To needing to be alone, or needing to leave Just because I smile Doesn't mean I feel alright I have my happy moments Yet I'm always trying to fight No, you don't see [...]

Just Because I Smile2018-12-08T22:42:42+00:00