I have struggled throughout my life with depression. It isn’t just a bad mood or attitude, it’s a condition.
I can be triggered by severe mood swings. Sometimes I land on an uncalled for anger, in a euphoric mania, or in a sadness that leaves me under the covers for days with minimal contact and sunlight.
For about a dozen years of my life, starting when I was about ten, I self-harmed. Cutting and burning my skin. This was not for attention like some of you may think, I hid it for many years, nobody knew.
I have talked to professionals, been on and off medication, I have also isolated myself in a self-destructive fashion.
When it comes to getting help, I’ve been on both sides of that spectrum and everywhere in between. I do however hold a belief that people are more powerful than we know or can understand.
For myself, I decided to leave my medication behind and increase self-awareness and mindfulness. I have taken the mind over matter approach; it’s not always easy.
It requires me to pay attention to every detail of my life, to analyze, to acknowledge, to apologize for a lot. It’s paramount that I hold myself accountable for my thoughts and actions.
I try to live a simple life, make good choices, and be happy. This means that I do not keep a large company of friends.
I do eat a lot of healthy food. I like to live and work in the same neighborhood. I exercise daily. I dedicate time to my passions. I’m not afraid to say yes to things that spark joy. And… I give and receive so much love!!!
Yes, I have struggles and scars, but I think I’ll be okay. How are you doing? Truly? I would love to hear your story.